My lover of two years is still dating – I want him to see me as a partner

DEAR DEIDRE: THOUGH we’ve been sleeping together for two years, my lover is still going on dates with other people.

Despite the 18-year age gap, I know we’d be a great pairing.


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We met working at the same pub. He’s 42, I’m 24.

He was flirty from the start, and one night, when my parents weren’t home, he came round for a drink.

We ended up having passionate sex on the sofa.

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Now we see each other a couple of times a week. But recently he told me he was being set up on a blind date.

When I asked him if this was a regular thing, he said: “Well I have to settle down at some point.”

How do I make him consider me as a potential partner?

DEIDRE SAYS: If you have been an item for two years, he probably has decided if this could be anything more serious – and his answer is no.

Have you talked about what you’re both looking for? For example, he may want marriage and children sooner than you do.

After this, you may realise he isn’t right for you either.

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