‘My best mate bonked my boyfriend in our bed – it looked like a hurricane hit’
My oldest friend always resented my success. She hates the fact I have a good job and earn more than her.
At the moment she’s single and I’m in a relationship – and she doesn’t like it. Three times recently I’ve caught her sucking up to my man and now I’m convinced that she’s after him.
The other week I was walking through town when I spotted her, with him in a wine bar. They were drinking and laughing, and she had her arm around his neck
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Naturally I went in and joined them. He looked happy to see me (relieved even), but she looked decidedly miffed. A few days later she came to me in tears. Her flatmate was driving her nuts, could she come stay with us for a short while?
I returned home early a few nights later to find her wrapped around him on the sofa, this time he looked very comfortable. I had to call him into the kitchen to drag them apart. And, last week I returned home from a few days away to chaos.
Our bedroom looked like it had been hit by a hurricane, the bed linen was filthy, there were empty bottles all over the floor and a lamp had been knocked over and broken.
More crucially, my mate’s room didn’t look like it had been slept in. Understandably I drew one conclusion, that she had been sleeping with my man.
I went berserk and threw her out. Yet he’s still insisting I’ve got it all wrong. He’s saying that she slept with other men in our bed, while he hid out at his mum’s.
He absolutely swears that he has never cheated on me and that he was forced to get away from her because she was acting so badly. Do I believe him?
JANE SAYS: Quite rightly, you threw your friend out of your flat and now you have to ensure that she stays out of your life forever. The woman sounds like poison, from being jealous of your successes to trashing your bedroom.
I get the impression that far from simply “resenting” you she hates your guts… and probably always has.
Your life is better without her in it. As for your partner, what is your gut instinct? Do you believe that he was one of the mystery men in your bed?
If he wasn’t then why did he run? Why did he allow your friend to mess around and destroy your most precious, private space – your bedroom? Why didn’t he stand up for himself and tell her “no”?
Do you believe he hid out at his mum’s place? Can you confront her and ask her? No one would blame you for feeling utterly exhausted and confused right now.
Tell your bloke that you need space. Suggest he stays with family while you think things through. Even if he didn’t cheat, do you believe that your guy has been supportive and strong?
Is it forcing you to question your relationship? Would you be better off single and away from them both?
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